At everything and everyone and I don't even know if it's just me or what. It could be PMS since apparently it happens +/- one week and I could be a hormonal monster and PMS happens to be +/- two weeks which makes me PMSy all the time which then again I'm sure I'm not!

I'm at an infinite level of frustrated and I know I should just Let It Go {insert song here} but you know, some things are not that simple. Easier said than done. I feel like anything that could possibly happen will set me off the edge and I will lose it. Don't think it's the side effects of my medication cause I've been on it for about 4 months and it shouldn't set in so late..?

Here're my list of frustrations, I hope I feel better. Even marginally would be good. Otherwise a good fuck would work too.

• Birthday
• Why the fuck would the 2 most important people in my life choose to go overseas on my 21st birthday?!
• Who plans their own birthday party form top to toe?! Invites (doing & sending), decorations, maps, food, cake, etc). I'm doing them ALL.BY.MYSELF. So much fucking hate right now, I'm not even 5% in the mood for my own party.
• I am alone. Will be alone. And I will mope around all day on said actual day because I like to feel sorry for myself due to above reasons. Or maybe I will go out and spend a shitload of money and face the fury but shrug it off anyway. Still undecided right now. Actually my perfect day would be to wake up when I like it, order some food, watch TV all day, take a long shower, read a good book & go to sleep at a proper hour.
• Nothing to wear. Usual girls' rant. But I really don't have anything appropriate. My mum thinks everything is indecent and clothes that used to fit me well don't anymore (lost a little bit of weight so that's a good thing).
• UGJASDFBDLSNGSDNGJK

• Family
• So much (temporary) hate right now.
• See above point 1.
• Not on talking terms with someone because we are both stubborn idiots who refuse to give in and I dislike him so much for it right now I can't even... 
• Someone else is being a prick and turning into a type of someone we both used to mock & hate and she doesn't even see it.
• Favourite person in the whole wide world has serious doubts about my future. Thanks for the faith in me. Really.
• Just generally annoyed.

• Money
• This is pretty much self-explanatory.

• Life
• Wisdom tooth extraction. It doesn't bother me so much anymore but I sometimes get aches and I sort of trained my stomach and brain to not eat anymore. I can more or less survive on air right now. Insert sarcasm here.
• School. Not much to say. Just that my grades are horrible (still passed but not satisfactory) and the commute time always drives me nuts.
• I can't survive in this country.

samantha t.
too tall for my own shoes

1993
☼☼☼

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